Music Monday - Lord, I Need You

Monday, 5 February 2018

I have mentioned that there are some tough things that are going on in Council.  Because I am Chair I am having to deal with them and to be honest I am not leading well.  It is hard when people don't respect you because you are a woman.  A friend also gave me the advice that it is because I do not exude fear and am pretty approachable.  His thought is that people equate fear and respect.  Not that I am ready to throw out my belief it is because I am a woman, it has given me something to think about.  

Yesterday, I went to church with my stomach in knots and very little sleep.  This whole thing is really affecting every inch of my life.  I have been trying to lean in on God but I don't always get that right either.  After an altercation with a member, I will confess that I threw my Synod Calvin College mug out the door in frustration.  I am part Irish and have a temper.  I will totally own that one.  I then went into to the Sanctuary.

After a quick organization, I started to listen to the worship.  It is true that worship can definitely change your poster.  The team started playing "Lord I Need You."  In those first words God had my attention...

"Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You're the One that guides my heart"

I did need to confess.  My brokenness, my control, my pride, my anger.  I have realized that I have been trying to solve the problem and probably not in a good way.  I don't have the answers.  He does.  You only have to go into His word to find them.  He always has the answers, because He is the answer.  And, Yes, we need Him.  He is our defence and our righteousness.  

I often need to be reminded of this.  

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